A Moment to Reflect on 2019 // Goals for 2020

2020 is almost upon us.

Last year around this time I stated:

“This year has been pure 100% garbage.”

Boy if only I had known what 2019 was gonna bring! Failed out of college, financially ruined, health is the worse its been in all of my existence.

My goals were an interesting lot. I intended on getting my finances figured out. That… still hasn’t happened, surprisingly! Career wise I wanted to “strive to learn more, and not fall into bad habits.” It’s been a process; I think work cutting hours back from 72 to 65 has in some ways helped. I still had some moments in 2019 I wasn’t proud of but no one caught me sleeping in the closet (because I didn’t, not because no one checked) so that’s a plus. My autistic son is still not 100% toilet trained, which was a goal; he understands how to use the restroom and will with me but still gets so caught up in his thought processes he won’t always actively go to the restroom. But I recognize progress was made, and I feel like I’ve been a solid part of that progress. One of my goals was to “figure things out with my wife” and I’d argue that’s just as bad if not a little worse than it was in 2019. I jokingly said “I will fold exactly three pieces of clothing and I will do the dishes at least once in 2019.” I’m unhappy with the cleanliness of the house but I have made some strides. I’ve come to realize the biggest issue is a lot of things in this house just don’t have a place, and also there’s a lot of clothes and clutter we don’t actually need.

In 2019, I said I would “write more.” I didn’t do too well at this, but especially the last three months I’ve been active with my blog and I’m going to continue to work on that. I also had a long-running goal of reading “at least two fiction books” and this year I read over 40, which is literally more than the last 8 years combined including when I read while incarcerated.

It is really, *really* easy to focus on the negatives. Like, excessively easy. So I thought I’d acknowledge the positives.

Being willing to review books I’ve read has made me a surprising number of author friends, some of which have been very encouraging of my own writing. A lot of different people from different walks of life, all of them awesome.

I’ve gotten to see my kids grow as individuals. My oldest son does his best to take care of himself and his siblings, even as he struggles with anger. I feel he’s taken the initiative more often than not. My daughter has become crazy good at reading, expressing herself, and making new friends. And my youngest is using full sentences and is not afraid to assert himself. He continues to be a happy child, enough when he’s frustrated.

I’ve been reading under Flav Medeiros, who is something of a business mentor who specializes in personal and small businesses. His classes have been encouraging me to work on myself as a brand, which has been helping me look at additional ways to make money when I’m not at work making money. Some of the ideas he’s given me are grounded in such a way they seem achievable. Grateful for that.

So, 2020. A new decade, but really just a continuation of where we are at now. A few solid easily achievable goals (not “resolutions”):

1.)No more energy drinks. Not one. I did the math and one week between my wife and I we spent $140 on these things. They aren’t helping my health. I doubt they are helping my anxiety.

Steps: Just don’t buy them. Problem solved! I arguably shouldn’t be drinking coffee, but given my doctor says it’s good for my asthma I may consider it in moderation. Failing that, I guess some people drink water. The stuff you find in toilets? I dunno, I’ll try it if I get desperate.

2.)Get my blog to earn $100 this year

This goal isn’t as arbitrary as it sounds – the idea is that if it makes this much it’s paying for itself.

Steps:

1.)Post twice a week
1.a)Get better at planning posts and making them in advance
2.)Continue to find ways to monetize it (Google Adsense doesn’t seem that profitable, really.)

3.)Get the house cleaner

Steps:

1.)Get better organized
2.)Declutter
3.)Get the kids involved

4.)Finances

Steps:

1.)Research budgeting software
2.)Continually watch what is being spent where
3.)Have realistic goals
3a.)If goals can not be met, consider debt consolidation or worst case scenario bankruptcy. This is a nuclear option but my credit is already so god awful it would arguably be beneficial.

5.)Published – no more excuses. I want a book out by March 6th.

1.)Look at ideas I’ve had over 2019, some of which have had amazing feedback. COMMIT TO ONE
2.)Write
3.)Don’t worry if it’s horrible just write it
3b.)Target is 60k words + 10k or minus 5k.

I have a lot of things I want, and need, to work on. But these goals are tied to very specific regrets and concerns I have had over 2019. Hopefully working on these will set me up well for 2020. Wish me luck!