On The Asterisk (I’m 42 Today)

I’m 42 today. Not celebrating until the weekend because I’m broke, but posting this because I have thoughts.

In Douglas Adams’ “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Universe” there is a long-running bit of commentary/joke about how the answer to “Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything” as figured out by the Super Computer Deep Thought is “42.” The author stated this was meant as a bit of a joke, and commentary on how the beings that asked the question didn’t really understand it. Fans have put their own spin on the answer, pointing out that among other things that the number 42 is the ASCII number for the asterisk, which is a bit of a wild card, essentially meaning “anything you want.” This is relevant because I’m 42 but it isn’t what I want to talk about; it’s a segue. Not a Segway; that’s one of those electric vehicles.

In Douglas Adams’ universe, the most important item a traveler can have is a towel. In the first book, he writes:

“A towel, [The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy] says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-boggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can’t see it, it can’t see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

This is what I want to talk about, but not in the literal sense.

There is an idiom in English about “Throwing in the towel.” It essentially means to give up. It apparently comes from boxing, when a promotor or couch would literally throw a towel in the ring to indicate surrender. That’s what I have been told, anyways; I have watched a fair share of boxing matches and not once have I ever seen someone throw a towel into the boxing ring. Also, why do they call it a ring when it’s a square shaped platform? English sure is weird.

I’ve been through a few things in my life. More than some people, less than others. Many are of circumstance; many more are of circumstance which I had a hand in. My mental health and very nature of being means that I get to struggle with things like depression, constant need of validation, a brain that can’t see the trees through the forest or the forest through the trees that are on fire, and a need to compartmentalize everything into neat little emotional boxes while being completely unable to do the same with organizing my life around me. I am a mess of a person, and part of getting older is continuing to work on and overcoming those issues while also knowing that they’ll always be there in some way, and also we all have our crosses to bear. Basically we’re all like Jesus, in that the Romans are gonna kill us but it’s okay because it was predestined, but it isn’t okay that one of our followers is gonna betray us, even though that too was predestined.

Anyways, towels. I need to do laundry, but that’s not what this is about. I think there is an overwhelming important message there, that the most important thing a traveler needs, be they a character in some science fiction fantasy where mice are the real scientists, or the real world where we all struggle to figure out where our next meal is coming from, is not to give up. Hold on to that towel. Make it work for us. Take everything that is “us” and use it to the best of our ability.

Also, no man is an island. This is because an island is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “a tract of land surrounded by water and smaller than a continent” while a man is defined as “the antonym for bear.” We’re all in this together. It’s important to work on ourselves, and improve ourselves, but it is ALSO important that we reach out to those around us, and both help each other as we can, and not be afraid to ask for help when needed. The quiet bird doesn’t get the mother’s pre-chewed worm-food, after all.

… I don’t want pre-chewed worm-food. Maybe I should just encourage everyone to be quiet and not say anything.

Except, that wouldn’t work. I wouldn’t be where I am today without the many people I’ve met in my life, fellow travelers all. Some of them I’ve had to part ways with on good terms, and others we crashed and burned together, only for us to rise again as angry phoenixes planning on burning forests with our magnificent wings. I have loved and been loved; I have hurt and been hurt. I have overcame. And I absolutely have to give myself credit for my role in both the good and bad in my life, but with that I must also admit and state that I would not be in the place that I am if it weren’t for the hard work and dedication of those around me who have encouraged me (and in some cases actively worked) to be my best self. Not all of those people are still in my life, and that feels in many ways unfortunate, but that’s also the nature of life and travelling in general.

I guess what I’m saying, in way too many words, is hold on to that towel. I mean, wash the damn thing, no one likes a dirty towel, maybe replace it when it stops working, but never give up on it.

Or something.

Kind of excited for where the rest of my life brings me. Just need to keep taking positive steps forward, enforcing good habits, and maybe not writing paragraphs of pontifications while on company time where my boss and coworkers can see.

Happy 14th, you all. Here is to many more years, until the day AI steals my personality and pretends to be me to haunt future generations.